msconduct

Despite the massive thunderstorm that's been going on for the last hour and a half, Tropical Cyclone Tam seems to have done its worst now. Parts of the country have been cut off by flooding and thousands of people are without power, but it was at least a lot less severe than Cyclone Gabrielle three years ago, which was the worst weather I've ever experienced.

We were fine, didn't get huge amounts of rain, and while the wind was pretty powerful, without my huge trees I wasn't too worried. Let's hope this is as bad as it gets this cyclone season.

I've been avoiding posting about politics, because I'm sure we all need a refuge from that. Here are my two exceptions:

1. Watching Keir Starmer come of out of No. 10 Downing St to hug Zelensky in the street while the crowd cheered was my favourite moment of the year.

2. It's easy to think nothing is happening to oppose what's going on in the US. However, it turns out that's not at all the case. Good news, enjoy!

https://substack.com/profile/133919651-ariella-elm/note/c-97273151

Just when I'm going to the beach at the end of the week, my damson tree decided today to have all its plums in exactly ripe for picking condition. I net the bottom half of the tree and let the birds have the top half, and in return they let me know when to pick. I glanced out the window today and saw eight birds in the tree nomming away. A) adorable and B) uh-oh. No time to waste.

Fruit picking always sounds to me like you're swanning dreamily through a picturesque orchard in a floaty dress and a big hat, delicately plucking down a fruit from time to time and placing it in a quaint cane basket with trailing ribbons. Of course, if you've ever done it, you'll know that it's actually hard, sweaty, scratchy work, usually at the hottest time of the year. I'm only grateful I looked out the window at a time of the day that part of the tree was in shade.

Damsons are the bestest ever trees, especially for a terrible gardener like myself. They literally require not a single bit of maintenance, they're hardy and disease-free and they produce an absolutely stunning amount of fruit that makes the best jam in the world (if you like tart jam, which I do and so do my nearest and dearest). But hoo boy, they make you work for it. I sweatily and scratchily picked a total of 20 kg (44 pounds) of fruit, in a sweaty, scratchy hour. (And there was at least as much as that left on the top.)

So I had the plums, but then I had another problem: I had the plums. Normally I throw them in the freezer and make jam at a nicer time of year to have the kitchen hot than a humid February. But this year I picked way more fruit than I usually do because my mother has developed a damson jam addiction, which I'm more than happy to facilitate (the more calories I can get in her the better). Add that to the fact that I've topped up my freezer with as much chicken as I can squeeze into it in case bird flu arrives here, and I knew I had no chance of freezing more than a couple of kilos. So industrial level jam-making this week it is.

But argh, it's SO MUCH WORK. You're supposed to make jam in small quantities, but I cheated by looking online until I could find someone who would let me half-fill my Kilner pan (that's three kilos). The laugh was on me, though, as it burned on the bottom so I had to boil biological washing powder in it for ages to get the burn off.

I've tried various recipes, and the best one I've found makes you cook the jam over a low heat for a couple of hours: this means it always sets and keeps very well, but...it takes a couple of hours. And I've still got 17 kilos to go. It's going to be a very busy week.

After a week like this where the world is burning and I feel helpless, I'm going to pretend none of that is happening and answer a question instead.

31. What are your 5 bucket list items?

I'm going to cheat a bit here and say I don't have any, and apologise to the rest of the world for this tipping us into the Covid pandemic.

My bucket list items have all been travel-related, and the biggest item on my list was going to Antarctica. I finally made it in 2017. It was absolutely incredible and everything I could have hoped for. Because this was such a big deal to me, I opted not for the standard Antarctic cruise but a trip on a motor yacht with only seven passengers. I normally never talk about a "trip of a lifetime", because I like to think the door's open to return anywhere I want to, but in this case I knew it really was a oncer. First, because I did everything I wanted to do there, and second, because it was so bloody expensive. Travel has always been my top spending priority even when I should probably be opting for more sensible things, but this was scary expensive even for me.

It was an incredible experience being there with so few people. On a normal cruise they herd you onto a small piece of land in your hundreds when you get off your boat, and you all mill around for a while until it's time to go back, whereas we could go anywhere we wanted to. Sitting on a beach surrounded by thousands of penguins was incredible, as was kayaking through slushy ice amongst icebergs. We even camped on the ice one night. But the best moment, and without doubt one of the biggest highlights of my life, was when as we were on deck a huge whale came right up to the boat, dived underneath and came up on the other side. There are no words, but it was an absolutely transcendent experience.

We booked a long time in advance, like three years, because there were so few places available (and we needed all that time and more to save for it), and I was terrified the whole time something would happen to stop us going. Even when we were in Punta Arenas the night before, there was some doubt as to whether the plane to Antarctica would be able to leave due to the weather. That can happen, and if the weather's really bad you might not get to go at all.

But we made it, and I was so grateful. (I'm even more so now, as since the start of the pandemic the cost of the trip has ratcheted up from wildly expensive but doable providing you don't mind eating ramen all the way through your retirement, to utterly impossible.) And I even got to cross off another bucket list item on that trip, as we flew home via Easter Island (which was amazing).

After we got home, it's not as if I didn't want to travel anywhere else. But I did think that despite travel being my absolute favourite thing to do, the Antarctica trip was so incredible that if for some unknown reason I never got to go anywhere again, I could probably make peace with that.

So the pandemic is, in fact, all my fault. I tempted the gods of travel, and they couldn't resist. Sorry about that, guys. I did get in a trip to Vancouver and Seattle in 2019, but only weeks after I got home from that we were in lockdown, and because I have to be Covid cautious that's the last time I went overseas. So no bucket list for me, but I'm too grateful for what I've already done to worry about it.

14. Tell about a time you slept outdoors.

I camped at one point for months, not because I like it but because it was the cheapest way to travel. The most striking night of all of them was the night my ex-husband and I spent in Hammerfest. It's in the Arctic Circle and we were there as part of a tour through Russia, Scandinavia and Eastern Europe. The weather was pretty cold - sometimes below zero C. At this point in the tour a lot of the other participants had wimped out and were renting cabins to sleep in, but we along with a few other people were determined to keep camping.

The weather that evening was decidedly dodgy. Then it developed into a full-blown rainstorm. The wind was roaring so loudly that we had no hope of sleeping whatsoever. During the night we had to throw on our rain gear and jump out to help another couple whose tent had completely blown away. (At least that was easier than it could have been as it was light all night.) At one point a local cat demanded loudly to be let in the tent and spent the rest of the night curled up on me.

What a memory. It was absolutely brilliant.

Thanks to spiffikins for once again doing a sterling job of rounding up (and creating) questions for 2025. I'm going to try and do ones relevant to me this year if I can, as otherwise I hardly post at all. Since I'm living in the future in NZ, I'm starting with January 2.

2.Do you still listen to CDs or cassette tapes?

CDs, definitely, either the real thing or files I've ripped from my own. I've been involved in music since I was very young, have perfect pitch, and can't listen to mp3s because my ears can hear that a lot of the music is missing. It's very unpleasant. So I mostly listen to CDs or FLACs, although my true love is vinyl. You just can't beat the warmth and fullness of analogue.

I don't post much here because my life is so desperately boring, but something very exciting happened this morning (don't get too excited, it will also be desperately boring to other people, but it's thrilling for me!).  

We're mostly vegetarianish and eat A LOT of fruit and vegetables. How many? Well, one week the cashier who saw me every week at my fruit and veggie shop asked me how many people were in my family, and she visibly started when I said two:).

That fruit and veggie shop was so great. I'm not impressed by the prices and quality of supermarket produce, so it's worth it to me to make an extra specialist stop to get good stuff. I'd been going there for years, when last year the bomb dropped - they were closing as the landlord was converting the space into something else. Horror! I was really upset and so were a lot of other customers - every line at the checkout was filled with people commiserating with each other for several weeks before the closure. Fortunately the staff had all found other jobs before they closed, so we didn't have to worry about that, but it really left such a huge hole.

So at that point I was forced to find an alternative, and I decided to give a new delivery service a try. I'd tried delivery boxes before with other suppliers, but wasn't crazy about them for one reason or another. However, these people were getting a very good rap on NZ Reddit for both price and quality. And they also let you order whatever you wanted rather than just restricting you to a set box - that was important to me as I like to plan meals and shop to that plan to avoid waste.

So I tried them and they were pretty good. The prices were excellent (this was a huge deal last year when massive flooding meant cabbages were going for $8 even in season) and the quality in the main was good to great. And like my previous shop, they had a great range as they could buy things that were grown in too small a quantity for supermarkets to be interested in. They weren't perfect - occasionally something would arrive that was past its best, and their customer service was nonexistent (they just didn't reply to contact attempts) -  so if that happened you just had to suck it up. But overall they were the best option, and the lower prices meant that the delivery fee of $7 still made them good value.

Then earlier this year, they increased the delivery fee to $10. Ooh. Bummer. That meant that before I put in my order I had to check the supermarket prices at the same time to make sure that I was actually saving money (some weeks I ended up buying from the supermarket instead). That was a pain that did not add joy to my Monday mornings, but overall it was still worthwhile.

Then! This morning! I was checking out my fruit and veggie order, which was about $38.50, and a message came up "You need to spend $11.50 more to qualify for free shipping". 

FREE SHIPPING???!???!?!?!??!?!

NZ is not like the US when it comes to free shipping. We hardly ever get it, so we definitely don't take it for granted. And the great thing about THIS free shipping is that my usual order plus $10 for shipping  mostly comes out around the same as an order which qualifies for free shipping, which means that essentially I can add $10 worth and get that for free! So exciting! This is the part that's probably desperately boring to others as I may be the only person who gets so excited by fruit and veggies that I struggle not to impulse buy them, but for me it's the best gift ever. Now every week I have ten free dollars to splurge on whatever! This week I spent it recklessly on salad items I haven't eaten since last summer (tomatoes at the winter price of $6! Woohoo!). Next week I think I might go wild on grapes. I have no idea why we don't grow table grapes here since the country is full of wine grapes, but our eating grapes all come from Chile or California. What with general post-Covid prices and the decline of the NZ dollar grapes are now $15 per kilo/$6.80 per pound and I haven't eaten any for several years now. So many delicious options! Really looking forward to this little treat every week.    










 
  

Although I used to be a sports psychologist, I'm not usually a massive fan of watching sport. But even I was interested in the Olympics, because New Zealand did spectacularly well. We got our biggest total of gold medals at one Games ever (10), which placed us 11th, with all the countries ahead of us having much bigger populations than us. We even got more gold medals than Canada! Astonishing.

Our men did a great job, with golds in the high jump and the kayak cross and silvers in some of the rowing and the triathlon. But it was the women who really excelled. World champion cyclist Ellesse Andrews took two golds in a single day. Lydia Ko finally took the gold in golf after getting a bronze and then a silver in the previous two Games. Brooke Francis and Lucy Spoors grabbed a gold in the rowing. And the women's sevens rugby team cruised to their second gold.

But where we really made out medal-wise was in the women's kayaking, and a lot of that was due to GOAT kayaker Lisa Carrington. Lisa's career total medals is eight golds and one bronze, making her NZ's most successful athlete ever. Her first gold was at the 2012 Games, and in Paris, at the age of 35, she took an amazing three golds and made it look effortless. 

So congratulations to all our Olympic athletes, and not just for their medals. Win or lose, they all displayed grace and good sportsmanship, something that was far from universal at these Games. 

And before we wrap up the Games completely, I'm sparing a thought for the 90% of Olympic athletes who don't win a medal, and the even larger percentage who don't achieve their dream and win a gold. There's so much emphasis on winning in our culture that we have the ridiculous situation where an athlete who is one of the best in the world can lose out on a gold medal by a fraction of a second and still feel like a failure. The most touching moment of the Games for me was the interview on the BBC World Service where the BBC guy was interviewing a British athlete who'd missed out on the gold. The athlete was struggling to hold back his tears, and said "I feel like I've let everyone down". The interview dropped his professional mask and instantly responded to the humanity of the situation, saying "Take a deep breath, son. You haven't let anyone down. You haven't let anyone down". As a sports psychologist, I was always interested in the dark side of sports: what happens to athletes who don't win, or who are forced into retirement by age or injury when their sport is their whole life? It's really sad that so few are successful and even if they are their success doesn't last, yet we have no models for how to cope for this incredibly common situation.           



 

Good God, what a relief it is that Biden has finally stepped down. I had a lot of time for him as a president: I don't think he's had the due he deserves for his excellent handling of the economy, which many voters seem completely oblivious to. But anyone who clings to power that fiercely in the teeth of the evidence is by definition someone who shouldn't have it. And he had zero chance against Trump.

As for Kamala Harris, she wouldn't be a president who set the world alight. And the prospect of the racist and sexist dog whistles from the right over the next few months is exhausting to contemplate. Can she turn out enough Democrats to win against Trump? At least there's a better chance than with the Democrats sleepwalking to defeat with Biden. And while I'm not usually one to encourage ageism, with his potential signs of dementia there's more than reason to advance the age argument against Trump now that he's the oldest candidate in history. if the Democrats don't bang this drum as hard as they can, they're crazy.       


  

Not going to talk about the shooting itself or its possible consequences, because there are enough firing from the hip opinions and conspiracy theories already without my hot take.

However, what really astonished me is that even after sounds of bullets most people made no attempt to leave. Probably a good thing as a stampede would have killed more people, but it was jaw-dropping watching people standing still and filming on their phones as if they were at a Disney spectacular. The line between social media and real life is getting so thin it's pretty much disappeared.